I have a special treat for you this Poetry Friday. Several months ago, the luminous
Maya Ganesan approached me about co-writing a poem. I agreed, and over the course of the past few months, we've collaborated to create something I'm sure neither of us would've come up with on our own. I'm excited to share with you today our final product! (And for those of you who know me and Maya, I'm curious as to whether you can tell which stanzas belong to whom. . . .we basically alternated every-other, although we both offered suggestions along the way and helped shape the poem in its entirety.)
Carvingyesterday,
sitting in a plum tree,
I saw a strange miracle
under cold sweet sky,
empty dark air
a shawl around shaking shoulders.
stars spell my name
not the name
you used to call me
with your rough lips
and uncomfortable laugh
I leave behind
what I can't remember
in a sea of
broken
lost
praying
even so,
I wonder if you knew
if you knew what it meant
how each word
tore
scratched
clawed
do you remember
how much it hurt?
what did i leave
b
e
h
i
n
d
?
but I look at the name
the one I will never tell you
and something inside me
whispers,
I will be okay
my shirt smells
of you. are we in a new
world?
I wish the answer were simple,
a soft "yes" whispered by weary lips
on orange-tinted breath
I wish I knew, wish this life
was in the air like strands of cold
fog drifting away
but all I have in this moment
is dirt and tree bark
under my fingers,
rough but real
unfair but tangible
something to hold onto
when you're not here
the days washed away beside
us, winters and springs and summers
that we never cared about.
in those black-and-white minutes,
we belonged to ourselves and
nobody else.
it was like being a child,
sand castles and strawberry ice cream
and knees skinned on pavement. together we defied time,
two Peter Pans hand-in-hand.
I wish it were still
postcard-perfect. Maybe I want
something else. I'm not sure.
It's called insecurity, isn't it?—
—this wishing for things not there
when all I have to hold
are five letters
and a tangled possibility
_____
copyright Miss Erin McIntosh and Maya Ganesan, 2009
please do not reprint without permission